I am from country farms on one-lane roads
Tractors and trailers filled with baby pigs
Front porch swings watching the pink sunset
Stars sparkling during hard work at 5AM
I am from the national blue and corn gold jackets of the FFA
Speaking my heart out in front of 500 people
Judging contests and chocolate milkshakes
Black tights with runs and trips with an advisor driving crazy
All nighters in hotel rooms and friends made across the nation
I am from county fairs in the hot July sun
Ferris wheels and pork burgers
Playing cards in my best friend’s camper
Showing pigs to win that blue ribbon
I am from rockin it out to Fall Out Boy in my room
Not caring what any one thinks
Living for the moment
Determined to be an old lady on a Harley with no regrets
I am from singing my heart out on Sunday mornings
Praise of having such a blessed life
In awe of the wonderful powers from heaven above
Always having faith so that nothing will be impossible unto me
And this is why I write…
I write to clam my soul,
I write to unleash my soul, my tears, and my pain.
I write to thank God of everything he’s given me and for being in my life.
I write to heal my anger,
I write to scream my emotions out,
I write to show my love for him.
I write to remember my life,
I write to experience my pain over and over again.
I write to realize I am strong for coming out of pain and into the light.
I write to feed my hunger,
I write to honor God and spit on Satan.
I write to never forget love lost and love earned.
I write to have faith,
I write to later speak those words,
I write to change lives,
I write to change my own life.
I write to live,
I write to die,
I write to fight against evil,
I write to embrace purity,
I write to fill my emptiness,
I write to embrace my aloneness.
I write to cry my black tears,
I write to wipe my black tears away.
I write to understand my meaning,
I write to wonder simply why?
I write to cry myself to sleep,
I write to laugh till I feel worse pain than when I began writing.
I write to be in cold darkness,
I write to be in warm sunshine.
I write to taste that sweet kiss over and over again…
Lauren Marceé Schwab